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Various Police Related Jokes
These stories are supposed to be true, maybe......
The woman in question, a cute blonde as it happens, was pulled over for speeding by a California Highway Patrol motorcycle officer.When he walked up to her window and opened his ticket book she said: "I bet you're, going to sell me a ticket to the Highway Patrolman's Ball."
He replied, "No, highway patrolmen don't have balls." There followed a moment of silence while she smiled and he realized what he'd said. He then closed his book, got back on his motorcycle and left. She was laughing too hard to start her car for several minutes.
A motorist was unknowingly caught in an automated speed trap that measured his speed using radar and photographed his car. He later received in the mail a ticket for $40, and a photo of his car.Instead of payment, he sent the police department a photograph of $40.
Several days later, he received a letter from the police department that contained another picture - of handcuffs.
A man goes to a party and has too much to drink. His friends plead with him to let them take him home. He says no - he only lives a mile away.About five blocks from the party the police pull him over for weaving and ask him to get out of the car and walk the line. Just as he starts, the police radio blares out a notice of a robbery taking place in a house just a block away. The police tell the party animal to stay put, they will be right back and they run down the street to the robbery. The guy waits and waits and finally decides to drive home.
When he gets there, he tells his wife he is going to bed, and to tell anyone who might come looking for him that he has the flu and has been in bed all day.
A few hours later the police knock on the door. They ask if Mr.. X lives there and his wife says yes. They ask to see him and she replies that he is in bed with the flu and has been so all day.
The police have his driver's license. They ask to see his car and she asks why. They insist on seeing his car, so she takes them to the garage and opens the door where they find: the police car, lights still flashing.
A police officer had a perfect hiding place for watching for speeders. But one day, everyone was under the speed limit, the officer found the problem: a 10 year old boy was standing on the side of the road with a huge hand painted sign which said "RADAR TRAP AHEAD."A little more investigative work led the officer to the boy's accomplice, another boy about 100 yards beyond the radar trap with a sign reading "TIPS" and a bucket at his feet full of cash.