Don't Buy A Cuckoo Clock!
The other night I was invited out for a night with "the boys." I told my wife that I would be home by midnight ... promise! Well, the hours passed and the beer was going down way too easy. At around 3 A.M., drunk as a skunk, I headed for home.Just as I got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hall started up, and cuckooed 3 times. Quickly, I realized she'd probably wake up, so I cuckooed another 9 times. I was really proud of myself, having a quick, witty solution, even when smashed, to escape a possible conflict.
Next morning my wife asked me what time I got in, and I told her 12 o'clock. She didn't seem disturbed at all. Whew! Got away with that one! She then told me that we needed a new cuckoo clock. When I asked her why, she said "Well, it cuckooed 3 times, then said 'oh shit,' cuckooed four more times, cleared it's throat, cuckooed another three times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then farted."