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Deep Thoughts
by: Jack HandyWhen you're riding in a time machine way far into the future, don't stick your elbow out the window or it'll turn into a fossil.
It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man.
Too bad you can't buy a voodoo globe so that you could make the earth spin real fast and freak everybody out.
I hope if dogs take over the world, and they choose a king, they don't just go by size, because I bet there are some Chihuahuas with some good ideas.
The face of a child can say it all. Especially the mouth part of the face.
To me, clowns aren't funny. In fact, they're kind of crazy. I've wondered where this started and I think it goes back to the time I went to the circus and a clown killed my dad.
Whenever I see an old lady slip and fall on a wet sidewalk, my first instinct is to laugh. But then I think, what if I was an ant, and she fell on me. Then it wouldn't seem quite so funny.
Children need encouragement. If a kid gets an answer right, tell him it was a lucky guess. That way he develops a good, lucky feeling.
I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it.