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Elephant Rapist
A man goes to his doctor. He doesn't sit down, but stands in some pain.He says: "I've got this problem. About a week ago I was walking past a circus when an elephant jumped over the fence and raped me.
The doctor looks back in disbelief and says: "That must have hurt." "Of course it hurt. It's stretched my asshole to the point where I can't sit on a stool for fear of swallowing it."
"Well you'd better show me."
So the man drops his trousers and the doctor takes a look. After a few minutes the doctor looks up and says: "There is something wrong here. An elephants dick can only be about 6 inches wide but your asshole is at least 12 inches wide.
"Yes", replies the man, "the bastard fingered me first".