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Daaa Geee Willikers...
Actual dialog of a former Wordperfect Customer Support (W:) employee and a Troubled Customer (C:).W: "Ridge Hall computer assistant; may I help you?"
C: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
W: "What sort of trouble?"
C: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."
W: "Went away?"
C: "They disappeared."
W: "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
C: "Nothing."
W: "Nothing?"
C: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
W: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"
C: "How do I tell?"
W: "Can you see the C:\ prompt on the screen?"
C: "What's a sea-prompt?"
W: "Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?"
C: "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
W: "Does your monitor have a power indicator?"
C: "What's a monitor?"
W: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?"
C: "I don't know."
W: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?"
C: "Yes, I think so."
W: "Great! Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall."
C: "Yes, it is."
W: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?"
C: "No."
W: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."
C: "Okay, here it is."
W: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."
C: "I can't reach."
W: "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"
C: "No."
W: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"
C: "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's dark."
W: "Dark?"
C: "Yes-the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."
W: "Well, turn on the office light then."
C: "I can't."
W: "No? Why not?"
C: "Because there's a power outage."
W: "A power ... A power outage? Aha! Okay, we've got it licked now.
C: Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?"