Marriage Quotes

Marriage Quotes

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Many a man owes his success to his first wife and his second wife to his success.
- Jim Backus

I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry.
That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.
- David Bissonette

I've sometimes thought of marrying, and then I've thought again.
- Noel Coward, 1956

A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

I'm an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
- Sacha Guitry

Marriage is like pi - natural, irrational, and very important.
- Lisa Hoffman

She's a lovely person. She deserves a good husband. Marry her before she finds one.
- Oscar Levant to Harpo Marx upon meeting Harpo's fiancee

Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.
- Jackie Mason

Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside desperate to get out.
- Montaigne

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together.
- Hemant Joshi

By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher...and that is a good thing for any man.
- Socrates

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
- Lana Turner

Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution.
- Mae West

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My personal addition

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The worst thing about marriage is that you spend the rest of your life paying for it... even if you get a divorce!
- Walter Benton, 2000